My best friend has severe sleep apnea, and…?
I’m a nurse, so I’m well aware what sleep apnea is, what causes it, and what the treatments are.
My problem is that my best friend (age 53) has SEVERE sleep apnea, he goes for 30-45 seconds without breathing (while asleep). Its affecting his mood, his lack of feeling rested during the day, his extremities turn pale and/or gray while he sleeps, and one of these days I’m afraid I’m going to find him dead in his apartment.
He has seen a doctor, he’s had multiple sleep studies done, he even owns a C-Pap machine (which he refuses to use).
He had a heart attack 3 years ago, and had cardiac cath with 3 stents placed, and I’m certain that the sleep apnea is doing much additional damage to his already damaged heart.
I’ve BEGGED him to see a doctor, he claims that "all the bloodwork comes back normal", and his yearly stress test results are always "within normal limits". Still, I worry for his life, he is my BEST FRIEND, and I don’t know what else to do. I’ve slept over many times, watching him sleep, and when his breathing stops, I often wonder if it’ll start again, I count the seconds, and breathe a sigh of relief when he gasps for another breath.
He’s almost 100 lbs overweight, a former smoker, and bipolar.
Tagged with: 3 years • apartment • best friend • bipolar • bloodwork • c pap machine • cardiac cath • extremities • heart attack • nurse • one of these days • sigh of relief • sleep • sleep apnea • sleep studies • smoker • stress test • test results
Filed under: Sleep Apnea Solutions
This is a problem I run into daily with my patients, and my dad too is a "CPAP drop-out." You definitely seem to understand the ramifications of leaving it untreated. The best bet for the short-term is to find out why he’s not using his CPAP. I think a lot of people just don’t realize how incredibly vital it is for their longevity and quality of life, but unfortunately, that’s not something you can make him feel is important. As for his heart, let him know that even if the results come back ok, he’s doing some major long-term damage. It’s not good for your heart to be starved for oxygen for 1/3 of your life. Severe, untreated apnea is how people die in their sleep — when you spend so many years having to wake yourself up over and over all night in order to breathe, eventually the arousal mechanism in your brain just malfunctions. Even ignoring the effects on his heart (which it sounds like he’s doing), he’s putting himself at a huge risk for simply suffocating in his sleep. If he’s having issues with mask fit, see if he can work with his homecare company to try different masks. If the pressure is too high (and it’s probably rather high if he’s obese and his apnea is severe), have him see if he can get a machine with a ramping feature, so the machine will start at a lower pressure and increase once he’s asleep. There have been so many improvements in CPAP/BPAP technology in the last few years, it’s a shame to see anyone practically killing themselves over what could be an easy remedy. Obviously sustained weight loss would do wonders, too, but I’m sure you’re already aware of that. Good luck…I definitely understand your situation, and your friend is lucky to have someone who cares so much about his health.
Your best bet, might be trying to find out why he doesnt use his C-PAP machine. perhaps its discomfort, or the general feeling. See if there are other types of machines, or different models he may be able to use. Ask about different positions that might help. That is a long time for him to go without sleeping. I used to stop breathing at night in my sleep, and wake up tingling. I also realized that it only happened when I felt completely worn out. It may help for him to get a few good nights of sleep, and perhaps when he gets worn out enough, hey may warm up to the use of the CPAP.
Unfortunately, you must know better than many people, that if they refuse to abide by your medical advice, then there is nothing left you can really do, other than continuously urge them into better choices. Perhaps helping your friend lose weight might be a good start to help treat the apnea.
My father has sleep apnea, diabetes type II and obesity. I tried to tell him to take CPAP, to fight with his weight, but he is so proud that he don’t want to learn from anyone.
But, in one day, I scared him with a video record taken when he was asleep. When he saw the movie, he began the treatment and weight loss diet.
I learned this method from internet.
I hope it helps!